How apt for this song to be playing while I was typing this post. Check out the lyrics at the bottom of the page.

Only with enlightenment, can there be closure. An inexplicable outslaught of bittersweetness at the most unexpected moment of truth. And perhaps at long last, I am writing the finale to the chapter of Jovina loves Alwin, in the chronicles of my life.

What's done cannot be undone. With certainty I've come to this conclusion, because I've done everything I could to make it up to you with no reciprocation, not the slightest hint of forgiveness. Gotta get over you, there's nothing left for me to do.

Still, it does hurt to think of what might have been, if I only knew, if you only told me.

Often, she wonders if he ever thinks about her, misses her, but she accepts that these are among the many things that she will never know. Of all the possible futures in front of her, a life with him in one had been taken away, and she will never know if it would have held the most happiness, or the least. She will survive, maybe even be happy and fulfilled, but she will always carry him inside of her.

Enough musings.

The clock is ticking, I'm sorry, but I gotta move on with my own life, because even without you, the sun goes on shining, and the stars still glow above. It might be the end of my world, but life goes on the way it has always does, and will always do.

It's time out, game over. Done to one last cry after the fag burns out, and before I leave it all behind, putting you out of my mind for the very last time.


would things have changed if i could have stayed, would you have loved me either way?